I have a client who has a porn addiction. He's actually a respectable businessman who is married, got kids. After talking to him over the phone, i got a gut feeling that i personally wil not feel comfortable helping him. And i told him this. I also find it difficult to refer him to more specialized help because honestly, i don't know what else can help him besides hypnotherapy. The vast majority of hypnotists out here in my area are people who learn the late Jeffrey Stephens protocol, and think they can solve any problem the sun shines on, in just 1 session, by telling the SM the stop the problem. (i'm not here to unleash a discussion about direct hypnosis)
Can anyone recommend a solid hypnotherapist who is specialized on addictions, especially porn/sex addiction ?
updated by @ik-a: 09/09/17 02:48:10PM
I am in the USA, so I can't recommend someone. I am very sorry to hear there are people in Belgium who actually are taught and believe many issues can be cured (permanently?) in just one session! I have one competitor in my market who has been selling that line for years!
In America, I would estimate that close to 90% of the population could use hypnotherapy services. We have almost 70% with weight alone, add in drugs, alcohol, anxiety, etc. and I think that is a fair estimate. So, my question always is for those who espouse a one-session approach . . . "If you were REALLY able to accomplish this, wouldn't you be booked in advance for years?" Who WOULDN'T pay a few hundred dollars to permanently correct these issues with no side effects and no continuing costs?
Now, on to "porn addiction." First I would recommend you change your terminology. "Addicted" in my world means that if the person stops doing it, let's say heroin, they have strong withdrawal symptoms. In addition, addicts usually need larger and larger doses over time as the body gets accustomed to the drug. Is there an aspect of this supposed "porn addiction" that fits that definition? The problem with using this label (I believe) is that you don't leave any space for the person to heal and change. "I'm an addict, nothing I can do will help." BTW, I would say the same about other stupid "addictions" like "sex addict."
Are there people who negatively affect their lives with a habit or compulsion to look at porn? Sure! Have I treated any? Sure! Is that any different than the man or woman who is 50-100 lbs. overweight with their compulsion to eat? Of course not! Yes, these can be powerful subconscious forces, but that is my/our playing field!
So, I don't think you need an "addiction or porn addiction" specialist. How would you treat the person if they ate or drank too much? I'm guessing the same approach would work just fine! I work to figure out what is really going on, what is the benefit of his viewing porn, what is he avoiding? What childhood messages or experiences may be involved and then do some good old-fashioned effective hypnotherapy to release the crap and insert some positive messages!
If you think this client is difficult, try dealing with the MANY clients I have had who were sexually abused before the age of ten!
I hope that helps!
Inner Power Hypnosis & Coaching
Tempe, Arizona, USA
From personal experience, I know the late Jeffrey Stephens approach with hypnosis is "firm", direct and effective, however it's not for every participant. Hypnotherapy is a "different animal", possibly what you are seeking and this client-therapist model uses a "softer" trancelike approach. It ofttimes takes longer, but can be very effective as well.
I have helped many of these types of clients.
Jeff Stevens and I talked quite a bit before he passed comparing our respective models and in particular his authoritative approach versus my permissive approach.
You can change a behavior in one session if all the requirements and associated issues are handled during the session... the problem being making sure all associated issues have been identified and dealt with, which is often difficult because usually the client themselves have no idea what they are.
This was the main reason I myself switched from doing one session to generically doing two sessions... fixing the issue during the first session and letting the client "test drive" the result before coming back for the second session where we tune/tweak if/as necessary.
I do a lot of sessions and especially teaching to those over in Europe via skype, and if they will do skype I can help them, if not I will suggest a hypnotist over there named Isa Kose.
You might look at the website of Shokat Ali, life principles, he is excellent with addictions, most problems solved quickly, with the tougher heroin and meth 3-5 visits, he hasn't written 27 books, and has nothing to sell you, but has a mile long list of people thanking him on videos, and very reasonable.
PS, if anyone has any Jeffery Stephens videos for sale, I'd like to buy them, been looking for a while
Firstly, to echo Daniel, the language does matter - is it an addiction or is it a habit that the person doesn't feel in control of - because its unconscious. When we move from a disease model 'addiction' to a behavior model ' habit' it creates new possibilities.
Secondly with any habit change there can be multiple underlying factors involved. Yes you can tell the mind to stop the habit - but if its doing it for a reason, it will continue - despite what you told it to do - or it will pick up another habit to replace it.
This is why I believe that aversion type therapy is not useful. I had a client come in who had seen other hypnotists for stop smoking - and they made it really disgusting - and laid on the guilt and then 'if you don't quit it will kill you' - and still she couldn't stop smoking.
Using hypnosis - we found that the unconscious part of the mind in charge of the habit equated smoking with her dad and family connection, (her dad had died a few years back) so even fear of death was not enough to quell the longing for missing that relationship.
Parts therapy and integration are extremely useful with any addiction or habit. Hypnosis style, you can use conference room and invite the parts involved to seat at the conference table, or in NLP fashion you can do the hands polarity and integration process.
Ecology is key - have you addressed the underlying issues? - do the parts of the unconscious mind know what to do instead? And have you help the parts involved to switch their focus or take on a new job?
A few sessions can help you clear out the parts. Internet hypnosis works just as well as in person - via skype or zoom, you can work with people anywhere.
I hope that helps. Check out youtube videos on NLP parts integration, we don't need hypnosis to actually get the change - but NLP and Hypnosis work very well together.
My experience is very similar to that of Holly's in most areas. However, I have not found Skype sessions to be as valuable as those in my office. Not even close. They are better than nothing, but in my experience they are maybe 50% as effective. It could be an energy thing, or some other reason. That is my experience.
I totally agree with Holly on aversion therapy. And, I'd like to continue my skepticism about 1-2 session addiction solutions. While I suspect progress can be made, perhaps short term that LOOKS like success, but how is that person doing 1-5-10 years later?
Call me crazy, but right now in America almost 150,000 (or over 400 a day) die from drug overdoses. Just to put that in perspective 40,000 Americans died in 2016 in traffic accidents, which may be a new high. So, if I had a GUARANTEED, PERMANENT solution to drug addiction that could be performed in just one or two sessions, I would charge $500 a session and the line would be out my door and around the block! Is anyone doing that? I was just at HTLive in Las Vegas. I could be wrong, but I doubt there was anyone there with a Ferrari or anything that approached that level of success. In fact, most seemed to be struggling financially. And, let's remember that sample was of those who could afford the average cost of $1,000 in total to attend the conference. How many didn't go because they couldn't afford it?
So please, if you SAY you can do this, and regularly do this, please send me a photo of yourself in front of your Ferrari or Lamborghini--or maybe Bentley if that is your style! How about in front of your million-dollar home? And, if you say you have done it, or do it regularly and you DON'T have that type of proof of your success, please tell me why. I have had multiple people in my office who have personally spent, or their employer spent $30,000 and up for rehab treatment. Mostly with a poor success rate. Yet, wouldn't they much rather spend two sessions and a thousand dollars for hypnotherapy, rather than a month or more in (ineffective) rehab?
Where is your list of celebrity clients? On my website, I have a list of celebrities who successfully quit smoking with hypnotherapy (none were my clients). And, we know many have terrible drug habits. Where is that list? If a celebrity permanently kicked the habit/addiction in just two sessions, wouldn't they be touting the method to the world? To save thousands of lives?
And, if you charged less, wouldn't you be booked a year in advance? Recently, I treated a hair stylist/salon owner who was booked that far in advance for (very expensive) haircuts. That is what happens for services that are very much in demand and are VALUABLE.
Inner Power Hypnosis & Coaching
I think your measuring stick of fancy cars is way off. There are plenty of hypnotists who have fancy cars who have earned them with utter nonsense, but a great marketing mind. And I dare say there are talented people who have a very good track record of one-session success, who aren't shallow marketeers. Doing it is one thing, making the world automatically believe and cue up around the block is something different. You seem to assume millionaire success is a natural bye product of ability.
The free hypnosis social network. Learn hypnosis online with thousands of members and hypnosis videos, forums, blogs, and more. All Free.
Copyright 2015 © HypnoThoughts.com